It's that time of year when our kiddo with attachment issues begins to unravel at the changes in routine and structure. I will be honest, it is tough to revisit behaviors that you had thought (hoped) you had overcome. I don't share much on my blog on this topic, not because I don't want to be honest about our struggles in parenting a hurt child, but I feel I need to protect this child's privacy-their story is their own to share. I would always be willing to chat with anyone struggling with attachment issues by email though, so please feel free to contact me if you want to discuss things privately.
Anyway, I have no idea why Dr. Seuss popped into my head tonight while thinking about attachment issues, but here goes:(Oh, and if you don't have personal experience with the challenges of parenting a hurt child, please don't judge too harshly! We love our child with all our hearts, but parenting this child has been one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do!)
I do not like this kid of mine, I do not like them at this time.
Kicking, hitting, screaming “I hate you!”- oh the awful things this kid will do!
Love them, hug them, help them trust? Some days I think my head will bust.
Stealing, lying, hoarding food….can this kid do any good?
Love them, love them, don’t dare stop! Even when your heart might pop.
Wounded, broken, heart torn in two. Heal their scars? What can we do?
Hugging them ten times a day, will it make it all okay?
Be consistent, stay the course….could things get any worse?
Pray, pray, down on your knees! Beg the Lord to help you please.
I do not like this kid of mine, I do not like them at this time.
But, I will love them, yes I will! I will love them each day still.
I will love them every day, until they know they're here to stay!
Yes I will love them, yes I will! I will love them each and every day...
Until they know our love will never go away!
Okay, it's silly and I am certainly no poet, but that's my version of Dr. Seuss on attachment!
17 comments:
We both must read a lot of Dr. Seuss. lol I did the same thing a week ago.
I hope things calm down soon for your litte one. I think we all go thru times when we don't "like" our children ...but we never stop "loving" them. :D
Hugs to you!!!
Love and blessings,
Robin
Wow, so glad that came to you so easily...My mantra lately is "It won't always be this way..." HUGS and prayers for all of you today!
LOVE IT! Very creative. :) I may have to steal it.
Great job, and yes! There are those of us out there who can relate!
Thanks for sharing that Amy! This is EXACTLY how I felt about my little guy when we were in China. May God give you Super Powers to get through it!
Very well put...Amy can I put this on my blog? Several times a day I wonder what life is going to be like bringing home a teenager...so may hurts, such a painful history she's lived in such a short time...Love you sister. May need your "expert" advice soon :)
Very creative! I hope things calm down and this child feels the love you obviously have for them. It's okay to not like them sometimes, allow yourself that. Continue to give them and show them the love they crave....you're a good momma ;)
Terry, you can definitely put it on your blog. I have to admit, I almost removed this post as I was embarrassed at my silly rhyme:) We will pray for the smoothest transition for your new daughter, but please know that IF she has difficulties that you can share with us and we will definitely be here to support and love all of you!
I am so glad that you did not erase this post. It is such a blessing to know that you are not alone in this journey of parenting hurt children. It is the TOUGHEST job and most rewarding job that God will ever call us to do. I too would like to share this poem and your blog on our ministry blog - with your permission. We just had a support group last Sunday night and alot of parents are feeling the same things you just wrote. Thank you for not deleting it!!
Check out our notes from our last support group at: www.welcomechildorphanministry.blogspot.com :)
Kari,
You are welcome to use my silly poem anywhere you want!:) I know one of the hardest things with parenting a hurt child is feeling alone in your struggles, and it is a relief to find others to share your journey that truly understand the challenges specific to attachment issues. I pray that it will help someone else in this journey.
Amy I LOVE your poem!
HA!
Great job and yes one day they will all learn they are ours forever'n ever'n always!
Love,
Jill
PS I am going to post it on my adoption blog and link back here!
Love it Amy!!!
Hi Amy, I was forwaded your post. I just came home with two kids 8 and 4 from Ghana. I SO COULD use your help! When you are ready ;)
www.theteabotribe.blogspot.com
Hi Amy, I was forwaded your post. I just came home with two kids 8 and 4 from Ghana. I SO COULD use your help! When you are ready ;)
www.theteabotribe.blogspot.com
Hi Amy! I was given your name from Andrea (RR) because we are adopting 2 little girls from the same orphanage you adopted from (at least that is my understanding, 25). As I was reading your blog, I came upon your poem and I think it is awesome! I can totally relate! One of our boys, adopted from US foster care, has RAD, and I just really enjoyed it!!! Wow!! As far as the original reason I found you all, we are waiting on USCIS approval and have a few dossier papers left and I was wondering if you would be willing to share with me any info about the region, process, etc.. where this orphanage is. My email is kwestbrook5b@yahoo.com and if you would be willing, I would love to hear from you! Thanks!
Kirsten
www.bringinghomeourgirls.blogspot.com
LOVE it!
Perfectly said!
Laurel :)
I had someone share your poem some time ago and it continues to run through my head lately. Thanks so much for putting so elequently what I feel daily with my attachment challenged daughter.
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