The Boroughs Family

The Boroughs Family

Monday, September 28, 2009

Life is Complicated

Okay, I'm not feeling creative, but I do feel like an update is long overdue,so here goes: Life has been super busy with the addition of our two newest members. I keep waiting for some semblence of "normal" to return to our home, and it just hasn't happened. I have chalked much of it up to adding two special needs children at one time, but I just couldn't get past feeling overwhelmed on a daily basis. I felt like something was wrong with me, like maybe I was just too old to keep up with another set of preschool "twins".

Last week we took Luke and Irina for their appointments with the Developmental Pediatrician at the Trisomy 21 Clinic. It was a long appointment, but the positive thing was that L & I behaved very much like they do typically, which meant the Dr. got a good indication of their personalities and needs. At the end of the visit, the Dr. said she believes that Luke has ADHD in addition to DS. I immediately had a "so that explains it!" moment. This knowledge has really helped me to understand why Luke acts the way he does, and to have quite a bit more patience with him. I hate that he will have an additional challenge to face in life, but knowing this will help us as parents, and the school as they educate him. So I guess he really is more active and impulsive, and it's not just me being old!

The Dr. also believes that Irina has a dual diagnosis of DS and autism. I will admit that I have feared this diagnosis since the day I met her, and it makes my heart ache. My sweet daughter has had to endure much hardship prior to her adoption, and the thought that she will have this added challenge to face is hard for me to accept as a mom. The Dr. would like to see her back in six months at which time she will make a formal diagnosis.

After the appointment, as my head was swimming with all the conflicting thoughts and emotions, I asked my husband what he thought about Irina having autism, and he responded "well, I like her, so I think we'll keep her". I love how he made it all so simple. No, it didn't make all the questions and concerns go away, but what he said made me realize how much I love both Luke and Irina (and all my other kids as well!), and on that note, I'm going to bed!


Missy said...

Do you think that Irina's autism might be post-institutional behavior? Erik also has lots of autistic behaviors that I hope will go away over time, and I am hoping that they are just orphanage related... I have decided I won't let anyone diagnose him with autism until he's been here a good year.

MOMSWEB said...

May God blanket you with peace - His perfect peace.

To Love Endlessly said...

Sounds like you have a very full plate. I'm praying you get some answers from the dr. & some peace from God. Those kids are very lucky to have both of you as parents.

Meredith said...

Hey there,
I'm very behind reading blogs since... say... September 9th or so. But I wanted to encourage you that an autism diagnosis is 'tentative' until a child's been out of an institution for a YEAR :) That said, we are looking at a dual diagnosis with Emma and she's home 18 months. Some kids "come around" and some it's just another piece of who they are and what their background has brought with it. Many hugs and prayers, my friend. I wouldn't dream to pray for patience for you because you don't need more opportunities to practice it:) But praying God's grace on you and peace as you make it through the days. I've not got nearly as full a quiver, but it does get easier with time... or did for us :)

Meredith (RR)

alicia said...

Oh Amy sending you lots of hugs, Im pretty sure love will (and is) make a difference, blessings